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BREAKING NEWS. Aldershot are in talks with a billionaire sheikh from the middle East. They are discussing a multi million pound investment to get the club back up the table. Sheikh Anvack has promised to put the freshness back.

The first time I got a universal remote
control I thought to myself, “This
changes everything"

Sad news from my brother and his wife on honeymoon in Croatia…

Just got a postcard and they're going to Split!

No trains up from South Coast to Woking.
So annoying.
Happens most weekends but that weekend is so extra annoying.

You gotta hand it to short people.

Because they can't reach it on their own.

Money Shot wrote: ↑Sat Apr 05, 2025 6:41 pm Trains seem to be running ok that day with no engineering works between Aldershot and Waterloo.

They arent running up from the South Coast towards Guildford though. So annoying. Hate Trains.

Well after 5 years of being the president of my local stilt walking club, I'm finally stepping down!

Poop jokes aren't my favourite kind of joke.

But they are a solid #2.

I've just bought a Humpty Dumpty toy from Aldi. It's brilliant…

It comes with Aldi Kings horses and Aldi Kings men!

I took the dog for a walk and fancied a pint.
The pub had a sign, 'Guide Dogs Only'
So I put my shades on and walked in.
' Sorry, no dogs, guide dogs only'
I replied, 'It is a guide dog'
'guide dogs are usually Labradors'
I felt down and said, 'What have they given me.?'

Sad news today.
H from 'Steps' has been admitted to the hospital after a helicopter landed on him.

I was at my mate's stag night yesterday, when he and his brother handed me a glass full of yellow, lukewarm liquid.

"Drink it," they said giggling. It was only when I smelt it that I realised the prank the bastards were trying to pull...

Carlsberg!

Went out for a walk this morning and found a box of frozen fish on the pavement. I was going to hand it in to the police, but then decided it was a case of Findus kippers!

The bloke scanning my shopping yesterday was rude, miserable, and looked massively hungover…

That's the last time I'm using a self scan checkout!

My wife and I are having a competition on who can steal the most dog related stuff from our local pet shop…

I've just taken the lead!