STICKY : Boom Boom Mk2 (The laughs continue)

[Fuggletim]

I lost my Pizza cutter today, so I tried using an old Rod Stewart CD instead. It soon went blunt, and the first cut was the deepest…….

[Anon E Mouse]

A couple of my mates are having a joint party for Chinese New year and Burns night.

It's called Chinese Burns night...

I didn't want to go but they twisted my arm!

[Fuggletim]

I think IKEA got my order confused when I asked for something Swedish maid. Agnetha from ABBA has just arrived in a delivery truck…..

[Anon E Mouse]

We do not throw away perfectly good food in our house.

We put it in Tupperware & wait for it to go bad & then we throw it away.

[Fuggletim]

We do not throw away perfectly good food in our house.

We put it in Tupperware & wait for it to go bad & then we throw it away.

In a similair vein, I always thought Tesco threw a lot away, but I now know my other half buys it the day before use by, puts it in the fridge and we chuck it away for Tesco a week later!

[Anon E Mouse]

Dear voice on the end of the phone. You can't *always* be experiencing a higher volume of calls than average.That's not how averages work.

[Anon E Mouse]

When scientists said the Universe is made up of protons, neutrons and electrons, they forgot to mention morons.

[brian bloomfield]

Why did the scarecrow win an award

Because he was outstanding in his field

[beechcroft]

Why did the scarecrow win an award

Because he was outstanding in his field

There is bottom of the barrell and there is bottom of the barrell !

[Fuggletim]

I have had some problems putting fuel in my wood burner stove. It has now shut down after 3 x failed log ins……..

[Anon E Mouse]

Today I was struggling to get my wife's attention.

So, I sat down on the sofa and looked comfortable.

That did the trick.

[Fuggletim]

I really don’t get my other half! For her birthday she said she wanted something with diamonds, but she just got angry and chucked the pack of Waddington’s playing cards in my face!

[brian bloomfield]

Who scored the most goals in the Greek Mythology league

The centaur forward!

[Fuggletim]

I have created a new board game called “Bonopoly.” It’s like “Monopoly” but the streets have no name……

[Anon E Mouse]

I heard that by law you need to turn on your headlights when it's raining in Sweden.

How the hell am I supposed to know when it's raining in Sweden?